2-16-2014

Good Morning to All,

    1 Corinthians 13: 4-5; “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful”

          It is always interesting when I get to engage in premarital counseling.  You get to learn a lot about a young couple that you never knew.  You also get to watch as two people are excited to get their life going together.  They have great plans and dreams.  I always hope that half of their dreams come true because they usually have enough for two lifetimes.  They talk so “now”.  It is as if they only look at the next few days.  So I try to get them thinking longer term.

    I ask them what they think the most important part of a successful marriage is.  They almost always answer “love”.  So then I ask how does this work in your eyes; how do you see love as the answer?  They will usually stumble a little bit and soon they kind of come up with the idea that love is kind of like cream cheese frosting.  If you have ever made a cake and had it fall or have an imperfection in the cake; with enough cream cheese frosting it will look perfectly level.  So in other words, love covers the imperfections and hides the cracks.

    Now to many this may sound like a good idea but I am not sure that it is.  Hiding problems, either from your spouse or yourself, is rarely a good idea.  Problems have a nasty way of popping up at the most inopportune times.  They usually pile on top of one another and soon a lot of pain will follow.  Love doesn’t hide problems; love lets us work through problems.  That is why Paul described love as he does.  At different times of our life, love serves a different function. 

    For example, say a couple is deciding about moving to a new community or buying a new house; they need to be patient with each other as they weigh carefully the options before them.  Or perhaps one of them has received a couple of awards and raises at work while the other hasn’t; love does not envy or boast.  Love takes many different forms in order to face the different challenges of life, especially married life.  God gives to us the all-availing self-sacrificing love.  This then becomes our model and our goal.  We are to love our spouse as Christ loves us.  A pretty large order but it is our hope.

    So as we go through life, God encourages us to deal with each other in a loving fashion.  This is not just a rose colored glasses approach but it is one that allows us to honestly talk and share with each other our dreams and fears, our hopes and aspirations.  Love doesn’t hide things but it gives us the strength to deal with them in love which we have for each other because of Jesus.

    Father of all love, in you do we have our hope and dreams.  You give to us the gift of marriage, the gift of family and the gift of your holy church for fellowship.  Guard us by your grace and lead us to your eternal kingdom.  Be with those who are struggling to show love within their marriage and family.  Lead them by your Spirit to know your true love.  In Jesus precious name we pray, amen.

God’s Peace,

Pastor Bret